Category: Uncategorized
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In Memory
When my 30-year-old daughter died in a car accident in April of 2017, after her memorial service we were all somewhat at a loss as to what to do with her ashes. The church she and her husband (of just two months) attended had no cemetery. Her dad’s family is buried in Kentucky. Her husband’s…
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Reach Out
Tuesday marks a year that I have been writing a weekly blog post. For quite a while I had it on my heart to share what I have learned as a grieving parent and to perhaps help others navigate this dark path we walk, or at least know that they are not alone. I also…
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Seasons
This coming Wednesday, March 22, will mark 4 years since I retired. I value my 25-year career with Verizon (formerly GTE, for those who remember that company). I worked hard. I made lots of mistakes, but learned from them. I had opportunities and took on responsibilities I didn’t even know existed when I started there.…
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Strong
Someone close to me who is going through a frightening time with his son who is struggling with mental illness said I was the strongest person he knows. I care about this person and his son dearly, and I appreciate the sentiment, but I always feel uncomfortable with being described that way. I know people…
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Why I Write About What I Write About
A friend recently commented that not all of my blog posts are about child loss. It was a casual remark in the middle of a conversation and not really the topic at hand, so I didn’t dwell on it. But, in thinking about what she said, it’s true and yet it’s not. I’ve written about…
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Number Our Days
Our days are numbered. That’s not a comforting thought, is it? Personally, I’m thankful I do not know what that number is for me. And I’m very grateful I did not know that my daughter’s days were numbered at 11,112. How dreadful it would have been to have that countdown in my mind for 30…
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Souvenirs
One of my favorite songs is “The Older I Get” by Alan Jackson. I love the line: And I don’t mind all the lines from all the times I’ve laughed and cried; souvenirs and little signs of the life I’ve lived. Alan Jackson, “The Older I Get” This week my stepmother went to heaven. She…
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In Our Future
One of my favorite Bible verses comes from Paul’s first letter to the congregation in Thessalonica. In chapter 4 Paul is reminding them of what he taught them about how to live a Godly life. (I love how in verse 11 he tells them to mind their own business.) Starting in verse 13 he changes…
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Should Have Been
This coming Friday, February 10th should have been Rachel’s 6th wedding anniversary. I have to take a deep breath and compose myself every time my mind starts to go down the should, could, would have been path. Of course, I don’t know what her life would be like now any more than I know what mine will…
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No Fear
I talked last week about not liking surprises, of wanting to feel in control. I’ve also talked about being a worrywart. These personality traits and my emotional reactions to things are heightened by the experience of child loss. This is not uncommon; other bereaved parents say they feel changed in the same way. It’s good…
A Light for My Path 