A Light for My Path

I like to make plans. I love things that have structure, organization, and a defined conclusion. When I was a child, I was so excited the first time I saw graph paper in an office supply store. I had started a new hobby of drawing house plans. I would carefully draw the outline of a building on a sketch pad, using a ruler to be sure my lines were straight. I hadn’t yet learned the terms “scale” or “ratio,” but I intuitively concluded that 1 inch stood for 1 foot in my designs. Having graph paper made my sketching easier and gave me more options for determining a smaller or larger scale. I still pull out the graph paper when I want to rearrange the furniture or buy something new and need to be sure it will fit. I even drew a floor plan for the guest house we had constructed on our property a few years ago. The contractor was impressed!

I also plan my activities and tasks for each week. I plan my itinerary for trips. Even though I use GPS, I still like to trace out my route on an actual map. While I’m traveling, I like to have a visual idea of where I am and how far I am from my destination.

The Book of James in the New Testament is a letter to the twelve tribes of Jewish Christians scattered throughout the Roman empire. I’ve often wondered if he wrote (or had someone scribe) multiple copies of the letter and sent them out by emissaries. James was a brother of Jesus, so he had a front row seat for all of Jesus’s teachings, his miracles, and his crucifixion. It’s interesting to ponder at what point in his life he came to realize that his brother was the Messiah. But I digress.

Based on some words in his letter, James would probably chastise me for my over-planning (unlike my contractor). In chapter 4 of his epistle, he admonishes his readers for arrogantly determining what they are going to do in the future. He says:

¹³ Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” ¹⁴ Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. ¹⁵ Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”

James 4:13-15

I grew up hearing older folks often prefacing their plans and goals with “the Lord willing and the creek don’t rise …”. I didn’t realize they were paraphrasing James. We don’t know the Lord’s will, and we don’t know if the weather or a natural disaster might thwart our best-laid plans.

I’ve had plans cancelled because of a flat tire, bad weather, an illness. Annoying, but not tragic.

Like most parents, I made plans for my children. I dreamed of what their life would be like as they grew up and tried to steer them in the direction I hoped they would go. They both made some plans and decisions of their own – some not in the direction I had pointed. Nowhere in there was a plan that my younger daughter would leave for Heaven at only 30-years-old. Her life vanished like a mist.

I have to assume her death at that point was the Lord’s will. James’s words should have warned me. I don’t know what will happen tomorrow. I can’t really know how far I am from my final destination. Still, I probably won’t stop making plans. It’s too ingrained in my nature. But I will try harder to put my fate in the Lord’s hands. Let His will be done.

I’ll keep an eye on the water level in the creek, too.

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Laura