I follow a page on Facebook called “Farmer Girl.” The young woman who posts there has a cattle farm in, I believe, Washington state. She raises heifers that she eventually sells as dairy cows. Her writing about her adventures as a “calf mom” are most often hilariously entertaining, but also educational about what it takes to run a farm. But she is also a deep scholar of the Bible. Her knowledge of God’s word is amazing, and I am envious of her ability to bring stories and passages to life. I gain insight every time I read one of her posts. About heifers, barn cats, ear tags on calves, and God.
BTW, Farmer Girl’s real name is Erica DeWaard.
Her post from September 28th was about Lot’s wife. Anyone who grew up going to Sunday School has heard this story. Lot was Abraham’s nephew. Lot and his family lived in a city called Sodom. Sodom had become a wicked, sinful city and God had decided to destroy it completely. But He recognized that Lot and his family were the only people in the town who still were faithful and followed His commands. So, God sent angels disguised as men to lead Lot and his family safely out of the city while it was burning. The angels tell them to hurry and to not look back.
Lot’s wife (whose name is not known) takes one quick glance back at her hometown and she is immediately turned into a pillar of salt. The Bible does not say that Lot’s wife was wicked. It does not say she was unfaithful or had succumbed to the sinful lifestyle of the city of Sodom. She just hesitated for a moment. And I have to admit; I might have as well. If you had two unknown men suddenly show up at your house, tell you to gather your family and as many belongings as you could carry, and run for the hills, would you be able to do so without one little backward glance?
Have you ever had to give up something you cherished? Something you never dreamed you would have to live without? What if that something is somebody? Somebody you would miss for the rest of your life. Like your child.
If you had the chance, wouldn’t you at least want to take one long last look at it her?
Ms. DeWaard talks a lot about how she envisions Lot’s wife’s life to have been. How it doesn’t seem unreasonable to want to gaze for a few moments and fix those memories in your mind. How she probably would have missed her home and her friends and neighbors for the rest of her life.
Then, I read this sentence that took my breath away:
“… missing something does not automatically mean
you were supposed to keep it”
God has a master plan. I don’t understand some of it. Truly I probably don’t understand most of it. And, honestly, sometimes I don’t like that. I think I should be able to plan and be ready for what’s coming. If I know a hurricane is predicted to hit our area, I can prep for riding it out or evacuating. That’s reasonable, right?
I didn’t know Rachel was going to die in a car accident on her way to work on April 11, 2017. I look back often and wonder if there was something – anything – I could have done to prevent it. What if I had called her that morning and said, “drive safe, I love you.” Would I have been able to keep her? Would she still be here now?
I miss her. With all my heart. But, truly, does that mean I was supposed to keep her? For as long as I wanted? Because she wasn’t really mine to keep. She belonged to God all along. We all do. We are part of His plan. A plan so large it’s eternal. It has no beginning and no end. We can’t fathom it.
Lot’s unnamed wife looked back. If she hadn’t, she would have lived. She would have had her memories of her hometown before it was destroyed. If she hadn’t looked back, Lot and their children would have had their loved one with them for, well, who knows how long? I’m sure they missed her. But something bigger than all of them was happening with their story. They were not supposed to keep her – their wife and mother.
Her story has been told over and over again for thousands of years as a cautionary tale. Obey God. When He tells us to let something go, we may miss it. But …
Missing something does not automatically mean
we were supposed to keep it.
Laura
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