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Me, too
I mentioned in last week’s post, The Doldrums, how lonely grief can feel. Especially child loss. In first world countries these days child loss is mercifully rare. It wasn’t always so. Even well into the early 20th century most people had lost, or knew a family who had lost, a child. Miscarriages, stillbirths, accidents, and diseases…
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Doldrums
The Oxford dictionary defines doldrums as “a state or period of inactivity, stagnation, or depression.” It’s the perfect definition for the post-holiday blues. January should be uplifting. We’ve entered a new year. Made resolutions to improve ourselves physically, mentally, and emotionally. The decorations are all packed away, the fridge and pantry have been cleaned out…
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Hand-me-downs
When I was a child, it was a common practice among my mother’s friends to pass along clothes that an older child had outgrown. I had a younger brother, so my outgrown clothes went to girls in other families who were a couple of sizes smaller than me. Several families had girls a little older…
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Lavish Gifts
There’s a frequently shared meme about the Nativity that three wise women would have been more practical visitors to the Holy Family than the three wise men. They would have brought useful gifts like prepared meals and diapers, performed midwife services, and cleaned the stable. I wrote last year about the difference between the portrayed…
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Sheaves
Growing up, one of my favorite Sunday School songs was Bringing in the Sheaves. It had a lilting melody and an easy to remember chorus. When I was little, though, I had no idea what sheaves were. In fact, I thought the words were “bringing in the sheeps.” As I got older I learned both…
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Ornaments
When we bought our river house ten years ago, it was our weekend getaway place. It was so relaxing to be able to escape suburbia and our jobs for a few days, sit on the porch swing or the dock, listen to the owls call to each other in the evening, and watch the river…
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Peace
There is a song often played this time of year called Let There Be Peace On Earth by Jill Jackson-Miller and Sy Miller. The first line of the song says: Let there be peace on Earth and let it begin with me I was singing along to this song in my car the other day…
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Not Enough
From my journal July 7, 2019: Our son-in-law (Rachel’s widower — OH! how I hate typing that) came to visit us for a few days this week. We love him and always enjoy spending time with him. But, I admit I always anticipate his visits with a mixture of joy and dread. Because his presence…
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Revealed
I keep a notepad handy beside my reading chair to jot down quotes or ideas from various sources that I think might spur a blog post. One of my morning devotional readings is Jesus Calling by Sarah Young. More than once a phrase or observation in her book has prompted me to write. In her…
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Thoughtful
My 14-year-old granddaughter has taken ballet lessons for several years now. This is the second year in a row that she was selected by audition to perform in a city-wide production of The Nutcracker. Although she has been dancing en pointe for three years, this year is her first time to do so in a…
A Light for My Path
Carrying the torch for bereaved parents.
“Your word is a lamp to my feet, and a light to my path.” Psalm 119:105
Why I’m Here
It feels impossible that I have lived for more than eight years now (ed. 2025) without one of my children in my life. Yet, here I am. And, here I will be for however many more years I have in this world.
I’ve learned a lot in these ensuing years. Some lessons I didn’t want to learn and some I wouldn’t have learned any other way than through losing Rachel. I would give anything to have remained ignorant. I have learned that losing a child changes you fundamentally, just as becoming a parent does. I have learned that those changes can be hard on relationships. That members of the same family will grieve differently, and we have to give each other grace. That deep and lasting grief can be frightening or uncomfortable to others. That some of those others will pull away. That many more others will stand beside you even when your changed self is hard to be around, awkward, talking too much, silent, laughing inappropriately, or crying uncontrollably.
What doesn’t change is God’s grace and mercy. He is here in the midst of the deepest grief. His Spirit groans for us when we don’t know what to pray. And, in my case, He led me to a wonderful group of other hurting hearts who shared their loss experiences, their faith struggles, and their recognition that though we grieve, we grieve with hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13).
I’ve decided that just maybe I’ve attained enough life lessons to be of some help to other grieving parents. To that end, I launched this blog site and a companion Facebook page. They are open to all, but the target audience is parents who have lost a child and those who love and want to support them. My posts reflect my Christian beliefs and will follow Biblical principles. I welcome questions, comments, humor, soul-baring, vulnerability, doubt, strength, and support.
Laura 3/28/2022
We are all just walking each other home.
Ram Dass
A Light for My Path 