A Light for My Path

My now-adult niece and nephew attended a Christian school their whole K-12 years. Each year, the rising seniors would go on a mission trip during the summer to a Central American country. A school tradition was that several days into the mission, each student was given a letter that had been written to them by a relative prior to the trip. I was honored that my brother and sister-in-law asked me to be the letter writer to each of them.

In conversation with my niece before her trip she told me she was excited about doing something outside of her comfort zone and experiencing a different culture. On the morning that I was planning to write my letter, part of my devotional reading talked about cross-cultural discipleship and about how isolating ourselves in a culture, even a Christian one, that has no diversity can lead us to narrowing down our acceptance of others as Christians. Below is a quote from that reading. ¹

“Discipleship is cross-cultural. When we meet Jesus around people who are just like us and then continue to follow Jesus with people who are just like us, we stifle our growth in Christ and open ourselves up to a world of division. However, when we’re rubbing elbows in Christian fellowship with people who are different from us, we can learn from each other and grow more like Christ. . ..”

I went on to talk a bit about the town and era my brother and I grew up in. Our small Christian school and the churches in our town were anything but multi-cultural. Everyone in our school and everyone in our church had the same skin color, and no one had anything but English as their first language. As I said in my letter to my niece, “There were 7 churches in our town of 500 people – 4 white churches and 3 black ones. There weren’t signs saying we couldn’t go to each other’s church; we just didn’t.”

The first college I attended was a small all-female school. And, while it had students and faculty members of different races and backgrounds, it was still very Southern and culturally insulated.

Marrying a military man gave me the opportunity to move to various parts of the country (although, never overseas) and I expanded my horizons during that time. In the ensuing almost forty years I’ve been fortunate to live and work in cities and companies with lots of people who were not just like me.

Now I’m back in a small Southern town, much like the one I grew up in. The schools, of course, are integrated. There’s a large percentage of the population that speaks Spanish as their first language. But, the mainstream churches in our town are still mostly racially segregated.

When we had been living here about a year, I started volunteering at a thrift store in town. I met a woman there who has become a dear friend. We were born the same year, just a week apart. Our first names are similar. We jokingly refer to each other as twins. With different parents. Of different skin colors. She has become a mentor, a shoulder to cry on, a girls’ day out partner, and a great balance to my obsessive personality. She persuaded me to join the board of her community-based nonprofit organization. And, she invited me to help her in her grief support ministry. One of her ministries is to conduct grief support workshops. Most of them have been at churches, primarily African-American churches.

Where I am out of my comfort zone.

To repeat part of the quote from above: “. . . when we’re rubbing elbows in Christian fellowship with people who are different from us, we can learn from each other and grow more like Christ . . .”.

When you are sharing grief stories, when you are talking about the emotions surrounding the loss of a loved one, when you are crossing the aisle to offer someone a tissue and a hug, skin color matters a lot less. And when you’ve broken that emotional barrier, it’s a lot easier to get to know each other in other aspects besides just sharing the human experience of bereavement. After the workshop and final prayer, most people tend to stick around for a cup of coffee and a snack. Conversations segue to other topics than grief and you learn about other things you have in common. Or interesting adventures the other person has had that are on your bucket list.

Another quote from that same devotional reading:

“Cultural differences in the body of Christ enable different types of people to draw near to the heart of Jesus. . .. Jesus did a fantastic job of knowing his audience and speaking directly to their hearts. For example, Jesus talked sheep to shepherds, fish to fishermen, and bookish theology to bookish theologians. He was all things to all people. I think that our differences enable us to speak richly and directly to the hearts of all types of people. . ..”

I’m still not entirely in my comfort zone when I first interact with someone who doesn’t look or speak or dress or worship like I do. But, if I approach the interaction an as opportunity for us both to draw near to the heart of Jesus, there’s no other zone as comfortable as His.

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Laura

¹ Unfortunately I do not have the original source of the quote to provide attribution.