The holiday season is fast upon us. It seems that as soon as Halloween is over most people in the U.S. are rushing headlong into preparing for the winter holidays. On November 1st I saw a house that already had Christmas lights and tinsel hanging from the eaves while the Halloween lawn inflatables lay withered on the ground, not put away yet. Can we take one holiday at a time, please?
Some folks do try to slow down and focus on what and why we celebrate and honor the meaning of each special occasion. A common practice in November that I’ve seen for several years now is a gratitude journal or post. For each day up to Thanksgiving (or the end of November, or through Advent) they write down at least one thing they are grateful for. Some people share their daily gratitude notes with others; some use them to guide their morning prayers; some reference back to previous years’ journals to compare from year to year what their thoughts, struggles, triumphs, and blessings were.
I admit I am not that regimented. In previous years, I haven’t participated in daily gratitude journaling. And, this November, so far, I’m matching that track record. It’s not that I’m not grateful. I have so many things to be thankful for! But, the holidays are complicated for bereaved parents. Every happy occasion, every candle lit, every family dinner, every gift made or purchased, every ornament hung on a tree . . . every joyful instance is tinged with the pang of missing my younger daughter.
It’s not even that I assume she would have been physically present at every event. She was a married woman when she died. She had a busy career. She and her husband might have needed or chosen to spend some holidays and special occasions on their own or with others. The difference, of course, is that her absence is not a choice.
Still, I am not without gratitude. Her presence in my life for 30 ½ years brought me such joy. Her husband is a wonderful man, and he has remained a part of our family. My older daughter is a treasure. She and her husband have given us four precious grandchildren. My sweet husband loves me with all my quirks and foibles.
Hm. The date as I write this is November 5th. I just easily noted 5 things I am grateful for. Maybe I should try to keep this up. Just this once. For a month. Who knows – maybe a year from now I will look back at 365 notes of gratitude. And for all those blessings, I will be . . .
Thankful.
Laura
A Light for My Path 
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